Tuesday, September 7, 2010


I love my family. They are my family after all. This weekend made me realize how different I am than my family as a collective whole. While I respect that every person is entitled to their own opinions and I can only state my own opinion, it amazes me how these are the people who raised me and my siblings and I grew up in the same family yet we see things of the world so differently. I just don't understand how people can see the struggle people are going through for whatever reason and just turn their backs like it doesn't mean anything. They kept arguing that their tax dollars were not the thing that should support other people in need and that the church should do so but guess what people make up the church. It was similar to being beat up by the people sitting on the porch but I refuse to back down from what I believe. Do I have every single view as a Liberal? No, but all my views are Biblical. How can you pass by someone who is hurt or who wants help but doesn't know where to start. They have no clue what these people have been through.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Date Night

Ok so we aren't getting married but this was the closest pic I could find to describe what I am about to do. My husband and I have not had date night since before the summer began and trust me when I tell you when NEED it. So we decided we would go have dinner down by the lake in Rockwall, Texas. It is somewhere we never go, some place I have never been and it should be interesting.

Now usually when I get ready for a date it requires at least an hour of getting ready and deciding on a really cute outfit, however, this won't be the case this time. I have agreed to ride on the back of my husband's motorcycle which requires a helmet, jeans and the jacket at very minimum.

I have no idea what to wear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do you think a cute little dress and some heels works on the back of the bike? lol

Friday, August 13, 2010

Please Remeber Me


That is my grandmother in the middle. Her name is Betty Louise Bruce Lively Burns. She was born a Bruce, married my Papaw, a Lively and after he went to be with Jesus, she married a Burns who has since gone on to be with Jesus as well. My grandmother "Nanny" as we all call her happens to be one of my favorite relatives. This woman and I are so much alike in so many ways it's almost scary but I have always embraced that much to the dismay of my stepmother.

My Nanny grew up very poor, in and uneducated family. Her father was a drunk and her mother was a Penacostal women, not sure how this happens but they were a pair to see. He would sit on the front porch of the shack they called a house, smoking cigarettes without any teeth, every other word was G.D. or S.O.B but this was Papa. Grandma Jewel on the other hand once got kicked out of a Baptist church for "catching the Holy Ghost" and speaking in tongues.

My Nanny had a child at a very early age and soon after that met my very older Papaw. They fell in love. She told me the story of how they met not long ago. It was the first time I had heard that story in the 31 years I have been alive. It's amazing the details she remembered. She could recall what he wore when they met, who she was there with, who he was there with,etc. There has never been a doubt in my mind that she was in love with him and him with her but the story just confirmed it even more.

It was hard being married. My Nanny was pregnant 7 times and ended up with 5 children out of those pregnancies. They lived in a house with no running water and no electricity. They worked hauling hay, picking cotton and just about anything else that they could do in order to make ends meet. I have always admired that about my Nanny and my Papaw and even that quality in my dad.

By the time I could first remember anything, my grandparents lived in town, in the house that they live in now. My Papaw was a carpenter and my Nanny was a CNA at a nursing home, though they use to not have a name or a title. My Papaw took care of the cows at the cow lot, they both took care of the 2 gardens they grew and my Nanny loved her yard. There are probably 30 trees in that yard and at one time there were even more. She had plants and rose bushes and we would follow her around watering them. She had a green thumb that wouldn't quit.

As they got older, my Papaw got sick and ended up having a stroke. My Nanny and my Aunt Rachel took care of him. It was so hard seeing him like that. I hated it and so did he. He got mean, not because he just wanted to act like a jackass but his entire life he had spent working and taking care of those he loved. Taking care of those he loved cost him a farm he worked so hard for, now here he was unable to do anything for himself.

My Nanny's health got worse and the yard, well it didn't look the way it use to look and the house didn't look the way it once did. There was a garden but most of the time she had to have someone else work in it for her. She spent her time taking care of Troy, her second husband, before he went to be with Jesus and now it's just her. She is unable to do much for herself now and it's quit sad since I can remember her being outside helping us catch lightening bugs, she was the one who scared us with the Halloween mask aka the Booger Man Mask, he helped my mom dump the neighbor's pig (a story in itself), she would stop on the side of the road to pick wild plums or if she saw a vacant house with a pretty flowering bush in the front, she would take us can pole fishing and down to the river for a swim.

I am going to see my Nanny tomorrow. Part of me feels so bad inside because I promised my Papaw I would make sure my Nanny was taken care of and if it was not for my Aunt Rachel, I wonder if she would be? Out of her kids, 2 live in the same town and my Aunt Rachel is moving back there in order to take care of my Nanny. My Uncle Ricky mows the yard and Rachel does mostly the other stuff since she herself is sick. I don't have millions of dollars though I wish that I did for her sake and I don't live close, which I wish I did for her sake. It makes me mad at my family and it makes me mad at myself but only each one of us can change how we are doing things.

Right now is the hottest month in a Texas summer yet my Nanny won't run her window unit because it will make her light bill too high and she won't be able to pay it. I am going to be checking into some assistance for that. We are so quick to forget those who really need us the most in life and it is quite sad.

After my Papaw died Tim McGraw made a song "Please Remember Me". My Nanny once told me that song reminded her of my Papaw because she wanted to make sure she never forgot him. For me, it reminds me of her because it almost seems like everyone has forgotten her.

I love you Nanny and I will try to do better I promise.

Thursday, July 15, 2010


So lately things have been crazy around here. More than our fair share of the good ole American struggle plus Lexi's dad and stepmom are tripping! So I started researching direct sales companies. some of them have some nice things and all but I'm just not sure that's the route I really want to go. It's still an option that is on the table for me but I was thinking more along the lines of maybe starting something on my own.

I am an avid crafter and have made many things in the past including candles and soaps so why not go that route? I have some money coming in and it would be really easy for me to make up some sample stuff and get going. There's a lot that goes into the process so like with any other business, it's about creating a solid game plan and going for it. So we will see.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Getting Ready For Christmas In July

No one wants to think about it but Christmas is 170 days away. Doesn't sound like very long when you think of it that way does it? I posted on the 4th of July how many days until Christmas there was and the responses were pretty much the same, "Already"? Yes, already.

Having a large family means that Christmas can be very stressful at our house if we let it be but through the years I've learned a few tricks and thought I would share them with you.

vintage santa Pictures, Images and Photos

1. Make a list of all the people you have to buy for and then a separate list for all the people you want to buy for. It is a good idea to keep this list with you all the time. I personally have mine stored on my iphone.

2. Take advantage of off season sales and clearance racks. I can't post what I have bought and have put up because my children and my spouse read my blog, lol. I buy things for the kids at least 1 size, if not 2 sizes bigger than they currently are and most children don't care if they have on last seasons styles since they are very similar. I also pick up things that look like they would make a good gift in general or if it is a really good deal. I also pick up misc. craft items when they are on clearance and on sale. Old Navy is a great place to take advantage of sales and clearance as is JC Penny and Target.

3. Freebies! Yes, I said freebies. There are all kinds of freebie sites on the web giving away a host of various things that can be put up and then placed into baskets of interest for gifts.

4. Blog Giveaways. I am totally addicted to these things and have won some awesome stuff. They are a little time consuming and you should keep track of the ones you have already entered. I only utilize 2 sites for blog give aways but there are several. Right now there are 12 gifts put up for Christmas and I only started doing the blog giveaways in May. This does not include the things I have already given to our kids or mother in law or my nieces or that we have used or eaten here at the house.

5.Regifting-some will think this is not a very nice thing to do but I think it's a great thing to do. for example, I got something at my bridal shower that could not be returned and was cute, just not my thing. I put this up in the top of my closet and will be regifting it at Christmas to someone who it is their thing. My rules for regifiting: It must be new, meaning never used and it must not go back to the person who gave it to you.

I hope this gives you a little help in terms of preparing for the holidays. With 6 kids we have to look for areas to save all the time.

Merry Christmas!

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Happy 4th Of July!!!!!

Happy 4th of July folks! What kind of plans do you guys have? Usually we have big plans on the 4th of July but this year is a little different. With the accident, it has us down to 1 vehicle currently though we have many things in the works. This year we are just recovering from 2 job losses so this year, we are doing something a little different than we usually do. Tomorrow we are going to church as a family, we are then going over to my aunt and uncle inlaws house with my inlaws and all the kids and having a bbq while fighting mosquitos and rain so we can shoot off fireworks.

It may not sound very fun and it may not sound like I am very excited but I am in fact excited about it. I have a great mil and I love her dearly so any time with her is great. Time my husband, which has become very precious since we now work opposite schedules and both have very physically demanding jobs has come into play. Time with my children, minus one since we will be going to court soon, is always great.

I'm looking forward to not having to pack up a bunch of stuff and travel somewhere. I have next weekend off too and then back to my working every other weekend schedule so I am grateful for this time with my family.

Thank you to all the people who serve or have served in the military and for all those who have died for my freedom. God bless you all.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Hitting A Tree Saved Our Lives

Yesterday morning started out like any other morning. JT went to work, I cleaned up the house before my daughter, Jill, woke up. Once she was awake, I had some errands to run so the two of us got dressed and headed out toward the truck. Now during the week, I never drive my Explorer. JT drives the Explorer and I drive the Dodge but not yesterday. We live in the country, part of our road is paved and the rest is gravel.

We travel down our road and cross over this low spot that runs over a creek. This part is paved. About 300 yards ahead of that it turns back into gravel. My daughter was trying to show me something and I turned for half a second. We got on the loose gravel and it started pulling my truck over to the right, over to where the creek is. I slammed brakes and pulled hard to the left, sending the passenger's side of my truck into the tree. After hitting the tree, my truck made it's way back on to the gravel road and turned sideways in the ditch on the other side of the road with my front end sticking in someones barbed wire fence.

My daughter was scared and she was bleeding, which as a mom, scared the heck out of me but I tried to stay calm. Among the things that were tossed around in my truck, I managed to find my cell phone that was now wet and had no signal. After making sure my daughter was going to be ok for me to step out into the road, I managed, after several attempts to get my iphone to work and called the ambulance. After accessing the situation over the phone, the 911 operator said help was on its way and call back if anything changed.

I was so upset I couldn't find any numbers in my cell phone except for my mom's house. JT had left his phone in the truck at his mom's house so there was no calling him. My daddy answered the phone and through tears I told him we had been in an accident, JT did not have his phone, the ambulance was on its way but I needed him to call my mom and have my mom find the number to JT's new job and call him there. Some man stopped and waited until the police officer got there.

When the ambulance arrived, 3 of the nicest men ever helped my daughter and I. They were like angels. They wanted to make sure I understood everything that was going on and that they would be taking care of Jill so I could finally stop for a minute and see if I was hurt anywhere.

It was a long ride to the hospital from way out where we live but the EMT's tried to make it as interesting as possible. We arrived and they put my daughter in the room next to mine. I was so worried she was going to freak out because we weren't in the same room. I asked the EMT's and the nurses to let her know I was right next door.

It wasn't long and JT's grandmother was walking through the door and right behind her my husband. It was such a relief to see them. JT stayed in the room with me most of the time while Granny stayed in the room with Jill. We both had xrays and CT scans done and other than some bruising and some cuts we are both ok.

After we got out of the hospital I asked JT to drive us past where the accident happened. I had to see where it happened but Jill wanted nothing to do with that spot on the side of the road.

The tree we hit actually saved our lives. On either side of the tree there is nothing except for about a 6 foot drop straight down into a creek bed. Had we been 5 seconds sooner or later, we would have dropped over the side. The tree has no bark on it where we hit it and it's not even a very big tree but it saved our lives. I will gladly take a beating from hitting that tree than the alternative.

We are both on pain meds which have made me sleepy as all get out but I am grateful.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

It's Only 195 degrees today

hot sun Pictures, Images and Photos

I love Texas. I can't ever imagine living anywhere but here but my gosh it is HOT! The summers here are always horrible but you take a hard winter, that means a HOT summer. Today my oldest daughter and I dropped off the 2 oldest boys so they can spend the week with their friends that they use to live across the street from. It's bitter sweet to give up part of my summer time but I'm not the only one in DFW who misses them when they are in Houston so I share. Jilli and I were going to hit the local pool today but they are only open Thursday-Sunday and I have an interview tomorrow which means little missy is going to be quite upset when she wakes up from her nap.

I have a job lined up but am still waiting on a start date. Lord please let it be ASAP. On a brighter note, JT started his new job today. Not sure how he likes it yet but it's the one he really wanted. I made the decision, after hitting the clearance rack at Target and then after leaving WalMart that I am giving him my debit card. Things are tight around here and I am having a problem spending so in order to keep it down, he will now control the card.

I know some of you might think I ramble because my thoughts are one place and then go somewhere different but hey, it's my blog and my chance to write so, lol.

Why is it when you just want to do right everything falls apart? I mean, I know it's the devil and his tactics to try and get us off course but I mean really? For such a long time I was very selfish in my life. I put my needs in front of everyone else and did what I wanted to do and how I wanted to do it without any regard for others. I've been through my reaping season. That was the prior 3.5 year until the beginning of this year.

Is there something wrong with wanting to be a good wife and mom? Is there something wrong with wanting to work? I'm being serious. It seems like the harder I try the more opposition I face. I won't resort back to old tactics but man. You know?

Well I am done sweating. When you live in an older mobile home it just never seems to get as cool as I would like for it to in here.

Sunday, June 13, 2010


home is where the heart is Pictures, Images and Photos

They say home is where the heart is and for us that's our little house in Ennis, Texas. Things are kind of scary right now but no one is in a panic. JT has interviews lined up next week and I feel confident God will open a door for him. As for me, I'm a worrier. I can't help it. It just comes natural to me. I once heard a pastor say that is in a woman's nature to worry and that is why the man of the house must keep his thoughts together and why man is typically stronger, maybe that is true, maybe not.

Well, the thought occurred to me that we may not be able to keep our house and we may have to move into the the inlaws. Not sure how this is going to work with 6 kids and 2 adults living out on one bedroom but if it's God's will than we will deal with it but I don't believe that it is. This morning I got up early, something I usually do except that there are no kids here today. I left JT sleeping soundly in our bed and headed to the other end of the house where the kids bedrooms are. Good time to clean their rooms to my standards.

So I start putting G.I. Joe men and hot wheels in the toy box and it occurred to me that our kids deserve for us to do all we can to keep our house. Now we don't live in a huge community. Driving to Dallas is no longer an option and I won't have my Associates degree until January of next year so options for me a few. I decided while I was making the bed and getting ready to plug in the vacuum cleaner that if it meant working two jobs we were goign to stay in our house that we have worked so hard on. I mean if I have to work as a waitress and at the grocery store or gas station or warehouse or walmart, then that's what I am going to do.

Monday will start my major push in the job search arena and I am praying that God open doors so that we can stay in this house and I can count on a steady pay check. I pray that God bless my family and my husband. God has really been opening my eyes a lot lately to things I should have already known but feel as though I am seeing them for the first time.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Time For A Change?

Well I have complained and complained about my job and what is going on here. I come in this morning to find that they have cut my hours. It may not seem like a big deal to them to cut me to 37 hours but in my house it's a HUGE deal AND if things don't pick up then I will be cut to 30 hours next month.

I have an employee who was suppose to be temporary until things got slow but he is a personal friend of the big boss, so he is still here AND my boss just bought a new Porche. I'm headed out the door and I know it. I've been praying from a sign from God that's it's ok to move from here because of the money. Well now they have affected my money and I take this as a sign from God.

It's all I can do to sit here today and not tell him I'll save him the money by quitting. Ugh, talk about frustration.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Oh How I Wish For One Weekend Of Nothing But It's All Worth It

My life is very much busy. I almost feel like I never have time to relax. Today is Friday, JT's last day with the school district. At 5 I will drive the 2 hours to go pick up Alexis. Nick and Bry are already at our house for the weekend. It will then take us 2 hours to make it home at around 9pm at which time she will be exhausted and head right to bed. Then of course I get to do homework before going to bed.

In the morning we have to take 2 vehicles to my inlaws, drop off Bry and Nick, swap vehicles with Granny and head on a 4 hour drive to around Houston to pick up Joel, Jonathan and Jillian at which time we will be turing right around and heading back home. Of course by the time we get back, we will all be exhausted but I get to unpack kiddos and go buy groceries.

Sunday we have church and then I have to make the drive to take Alexis back home. Then on Monday I get to come to work, which I am not liking at the moment, and start my long week. I use to hate the weekends because I had nothing to do, of course this was before I was married. It took me 20 minutes to pick up Lexi verses the 2 hours it takes me now.

I look at my family and I remember that I am grateful my husband is a mechanic because we LIVE in the car it seems, I am grateful for the 2 hour drive where my daughter has no choice but to talk to her mommy about things that are going on and how she views the world, I am grateful for amazing inlaws who watch kids and let us trade vehicles for the day, I am grateful for understanding children and I am grateful that for the month of July we will have the entire 6 pack under 1 roof for longer than a weekend.

My life is total chaos most of the time but I love it.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

I'll Admit It, I'm Jealous

sahm Pictures, Images and Photos

I'll admit that I am jealous of every woman, mom or not a mom, who has the ability to stay home and take care of her husband, family and/or children. I had this life once a very long time ago before the land of divorces and I loved it. Now this life seems like it is not an option due to my having to be a slave to the old paycheck and those good old bills that come due each and every month.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying my husband doesn't pull his weight or that he wouldn't let me if it were an option but it's just not for me. I sit here at work, you know the job I've come to hate, doing nothing because it is so slow, thinking about all the things that I have waiting for me at home including the dishes, dinner, laundry, taking out the trash, etc.

I don't know maybe I was born to be a house wife and that is why I currently feel the way that I do about it or maybe it's just because I love my family so much. People say to cut down on our bills but they don't understand our situation either. We have 5 paid for vehicles: I drive 1, JT drives 1, 1 is in the process of being restored, 1 JT's brother drives when he blew the motor in his own car and 1 his grandma drives when she had to get rid of her car. We don't have credit card debt. Our toys are paid for but it's the regular bills and the fact that we pay so much in child support.

I would love to be room mother or PTA mom, to be able to always be there for our kids when they needed me, to attend all their school functions, to have my husband come home to a clean house and dinner waiting on him instead of him having to wait almost 2 hours for me to get home. I would love to not have to sit in traffic for over an hour each way 5 days a week or deal with the people I work with (except my admin ladies).

I would love to be able to shuffle kids to and from swim lessons, dentist appointments and have my husband never have to worry about anything.

I have been doing a lot of soul searching lately with everything that has been going on and I have been thinking of how to be able to stay home and still bring in an income. I have my cake hobby but I'm still a HUGE novice. I've made tutus and hair bows for our girls and my nieces but how many hair bows would one have to make to equate to the salary of a sales manager?

I am jealous that these women get to experience every moment while I am stuck behind a desk and only get to hear about the things that go on while I am here. Yes, I am jealous and only I can do something about it but instead of moving too quickly, I am relying on God to show me the direction.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010


Integrity Pictures, Images and Photos

I am at my wits end with my job. My large family means I can't operate like I am a person who has no family and no kids and just up and quit even though that is exactly what I want to. I have been in sales for most of my adult life and for a long time it was fun. I loved the thrill of the challenge, the close, the struggle. I loved being able to close someone even if it meant I wasn't totally honest in the process. All that mattered to me was closing the deal and reaping the benefits of the money that came along with it but things have changed.

A few years ago I started really taking accountability for myself, my words, my actions. It was the best worst thing I had ever done in my life and it took about 3.5 years to see the benefits of living honest but I like living like this. I like feeling good at the end of the day that I operated with integrity.

When I first started working here I loved it. I was good at it and I thought I was being honest. It wasn't until months into this job that I found out that what we do is a crap shoot. We lose most and win a few. Today has been the icing the cake. I got griped at for my employees out selling me yesterday, then I got in trouble for not selling a person who couldn't even make a half payment, next was when I tried to sell someone but couldn't for other reasons and got told I should have known that in the first 5 seconds of the call and then told a person we couldn't help them because of Federal Laws when my boss told him last night that we could.

This company does not operate with integrity, instead it operates with lies, greed and deceit. I am getting very tired of it and I am praying that God opens a door somewhere else for me so I can get out of this place.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010


stop lying Pictures, Images and Photos

When I first started working where I do I was excited. I work for a consumer advocacy group that assists a certain demographic with problems. I have to watch what I say because I don't want to bash them since I still work here and I don't have a copy of my non-disclosure agreement so I'll have to generalize, sorry.

I am a Social Work major and I thought what better place to work while I finish my degree but as time continues to pass on, I find out that this is a gamble, a crap shoot and some of the other people I work with have no problem with lying to these people for a dollar.

I guess maybe it has to do with who I am or the fact that I am a Christian but it has really started to bother me more than anyone can imagine. I turn people away all the time and once my boss finds out, I will probably lose my job. I am so unhappy here. I know this job is no longer for me because I just can't stand the thought of kicking people while they are down.

When did it become moral or ethical to lie to people or cheat them out of their hard earned dollar and in most cases we deal with, they don't even have the money and end up borrowing it or not paying bills based on a hope and a gamble. I know they are the ones who made the decision but why is it okay to kick them some more?

It's even funnier because I have a boss who says we need to follow the golden rule "Treat others the way you want to be treated." Well I can tell you I don't want to be cheated out of money nor do I want to be kicked while I am already down.

Of course I am looking for another job but nothing has worked out as of yet. I am so frustrated. I can't stand coming in here every day but bills and family say that until I find something else, I am forced to be here until then.

I use to be good at lying, in fact it was an art, maybe that is how I ended up in sales but I am not that person anymore and I don't like what I do or how I have to do it. I can't stand liars.

Friday, May 28, 2010

Cupcakes For Kindergarten

I started taking cake decorating classes a few months ago, totally LOVE them. It started with our son's Bryan's birthday party. He wanted a How To Train Your Dragon Cake before the movie came out so of course all I could find were the toy figures for his cake and that was it. We were going to buy a cake from the grocery store but none of them were making them yet, so we made our own. It was great he said. I however had a wake up call that I needed to take some classes. Since we have 6 kids, it would be cool to make their birthday cakes. My poor husband had no idea what he was getting himself into.

Other than cakes for class, I have made Nick's birthday cake which was a 3d one that was suppose to be a dinosaur and ended up looking more like an iguana, lol. They all loved it none the less. I made a cake for our family's crawfish boil which I loved my fondant figures, hated the cake itself but it was a hit and got an order for the Halloween party that they do every year.

Next came an order from a friend of mine for a Twilight cake that I will be making and delivering the 1st part of July. I am excited and scared because black and red are the two hardest colors to get right but I have plenty of time to practice before then. I also am doing a surprise anniversary cake for a special couple I know but I can't say who just yet. I am making a cake for this weekend and cupcakes for our church Memorial Day gathering. By far my biggest challenge and project has been for Rice Elementary Kindergarten.

I wanted to make cupcakes for the boys classes but I was informed I had to do cupcakes for the entire Kindergarten, all 66 of them and 3 teachers. So I went online to find something I thought was cute and was on my way.

One night I baked 140 cupcakes because I over estimated how much cake batter it was going to take. The next night I turned everything in my kitchen a bright shade of blue as I began icing all the cupcakes except the chocolate ones which belonged to JT. The cookies were baked but needed to be decorated and so I employed my husband, for free of course, to help me out.

He cut chocolate bars for the tops of the graduation hats, he unwrapped mini reece's cups for the bottoms of the hats. As I dotted the cupcakes with icing he was sticking the together. He is not an artist by any means, at least he says that, so the cookies were all me.

JT was off work the next day so he took the cupcakes to the school only to be told that Bryan's class couldn't have theirs because his teacher neglected to mention you have to do for the entire grade. I was sad but he still got to eat them so he was happy.

Nick however, assisted his teacher, Mrs. T, in passing out the graduation cupcakes to the entire Kindergarten class who reminded me at their graduation that they were grateful.

I love what I do and look forward to mixing up icing when I get home, making some more cakes and designing even more as our 2 daughters and my husband's birthdays are all coming up.

TTYL! Have a Sweet Day

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Reinventing Yourself

life quote Pictures, Images and Photos

It's funny because it seems like my husband and I have been on this journey for quite some time, at the same time but didn't know the other was (I mean we did just get back together in January of this year and married him in March after 14 years apart).

For me it has been a LONG journey through all these dark, ugly places that led me to this clearing filled with light and surrounding me by all the beautiful people who have always been a part of my life and introducing me to ones I had yet to know. I am finally coming in to who I am as a person. For years I put on a show, a front, because I thought that's what people expected of me but I found me and I love being me almost all of the time. Life has it's ups and downs of course and there are things that go on that I don't like but I love my life. I love that I am discovering talents I didn't know I had, that I can embrace my hip hop loving, country living, garden planting, truck driving self and am accepted just as such. It felt so good for my mom to tell me she was proud of me for all that I have done with my life so far.

My husband has been on this journey too. He had a not so good marriage that lasted a little longer than what he needed it to but he is very responsible and mature and is one of those people who don't show that he is falling apart on the inside. Changes came a little quicker for him, though they too still took a few years. He moved away from the town we grew up in because it was such a black hole for him, he embraced who he was really, started finding himself, the old him that everyone loved, including me. Well with change sometimes comes some things we don't expect. I haven't shared this with anyone but I am going to. Almost a month ago we found out that next Friday is my husband's last day at his job. So he has been looking for a new one but decided that he would only focus his search closer to where we live.

We both currently commute over an hour one way, 5 days a week. So of course, like any wife, I begin to panic and we had our little discussion last night and today he got a phone call that we have been waiting for. He has an interview with a company not far from our house with benefits that are better than he has now and the same pay he makes now. I am so excited and thanking God for answering prayers. I told my husband this was his job and I am putting faith in God and claiming that this is his job.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

My husband is the smartest man I know....why you ask?

We are going through some things at our house which I will leave private. Some of you know and some of you don't. Like any good wife, I am starting to get into panic mode about this situation. That's me and my high strung, put my feeling out there self. My husband on the other hand keeps everything to himself and shares little when it comes to situations where he knows I will freak out or panic.

Well today we had a discussion. This is one thing I love about my hubby is that we don't fight like I did in my 1st marriage or in the long term relationship I was in between my divorce and marrying my husband now. We have discussions which is nice because there is no screaming, yelling or name calling. We respect when the other person is talking and what they are saying. I guess when two people have dealt with the opposite before it makes the kind of fights aka discussions so much better. Plus we are adults aren't we suppose to be able to have discussions and differences in opinion without it getting ugly? lol

So I told him that I didn't want him to get upset about what I said. He let me say my piece and then looked at me with this very serious look but with compassion in his eyes and said you need to turn your P word into a different P word. Yes, I was confused too so he explained. You need to turn your panic into prayer.

The funny part about it all was that we were on our back porch while having this discussion and we were outside because that's where I was. I was outside staring up at the full moon and talking to God about everything.

My husband is a smart man because he understands what being a husband is, what being a friend is, how to handle stress and stressful situations in ways that help me not Panic or freak out. He is smarter than your average bear because he knows that it is really not something that we control anyway but it's all part of God's plan for our lives and we just have to embrace it as so.

I'm a lucky woman to have found my heart and I am lucky that he was crazy enough to marry and over bearing, high strung, opinionated woman like me. I love you JT.

Wordless Wednesday

our wedding bands
more kisses

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

For The Love Of A Stepmom

stepmom Pictures, Images and Photos

After the ordeal at graduation I figured I would take some time to get on my blog and talk about how hateful and ugly "it" was tonight but instead decided to do something different and that's talk about step-parents and how great they are.

I have a step-mom who has not liked me from day one and has been a wedge in the relationship that my father and I have to this very day. For some reason I feel as though she views me as a threat or maybe it's because I'm so much like my mom but I feel lucky because my step-dad is totally different. My step-dad is more like a dad to me than my real dad is most of the time. He loves me even though we don't share the same DNA, he dealt with me during my teenage rebellion years, corrected me when I was wrong, let me cry when I had my first heartbreak and has always been there for me even when my decisions weren't the best.

My daughter, Alexis, has an amazing step-mom who I thank God for each and every day. It wasn't easy at first to accept another woman in the role of mom in any manner when Erica first married Lexi's dad. I was hateful toward her and resentful but then it hit me one day: she loves my daughter, is good to my daughter and treats my daughter like she is her very own. I am blessed. She doesn't try and take my place, in fact we had an hour long conversation today about "our" daughter and what is going on with school and other things. She corrects Lexi when she is wrong, teaches her how to have manners and respect, takes an active role in her school and things that interest Lexi. Some may have a big problem with it and I did at first too but our daughter calls her mommy but when I am not there, Erica is her mommy because she chooses to be.

Now that I am a step-mom, I understand how hard that job really is. You love these children just like they are your own. You know they aren't and they know they aren't but you make no difference between them. You teach them right from wrong, you love them even when you don't agree with them, you take an active interest in their lives. you attend school functions, bake cupcakes for the entire Kindergarten because you love the kids. You aren't trying to take anyone's place and you don't ever expect to.

At times the biological parents make things more challenging than the ever have to be but you take it in stride. I wanted to react in a very major way with the things that took place tonight but in the end, I think of my sons and the love that they have for their daddy, their mother and for me and I could never do anything that would make them look at me any different.

I love my boys as much as I love the children I gave birth to and if that make others not like me I will not apologize nor will I change the fact that these precious angels are now a part of my life and I would give my own life if it meant they could keep theirs. So before you act cruddy toward the new spouse of your ex-spouse, take some time and evaluate what kind of person they are and how they treat your children rather than being worried or resentful that someone is trying to take your place because a real parent knows that won't happen and doesn't make it their mission in life.

A special thanks to my other baby's mama, Erica Odom, for doing something you are not obligated to do and that's love my daughter.


The winner of the business card giveaway is NICCI!
Congrats and I hope you put them to good use!

A big thanks to our friends at uprinting.com for sponsoring the giveaway!

Monday, May 24, 2010

140 cupcakes/30 cookies

So the baby of the 6 pack graduates Kindergarten tomorrow. For me it is bitter sweet because my baby boy is growing up, the end of the days of the baby and on into the big boy world. I remember when Joel started Kindergarten and then Junior High, I cried both times. When he was in Kindergarten he consoled me and told me he wasn't scared and I didn't have to cry. When he started Junior High he got embarassed because the once cool mom, at least I thought, was now embarassing him in front of the cool kids.

It hasn't been easy to get Nicholas through Kindergarten. Each day is a struggle to get him to listen, to stop playing and do his work so yes, it is a big deal in our house when he brings home a green face. In honor of him graduating, I decided I would make his class some graduation cupcakes, yeah, except I was informed that I would be making cupcakes for the entire Kindergarten.

Now we live in a small town, I mean small but we have a water department, a fire department and a post office along with the school that not only services our little town but the 2 other towns on either side of us so that makes Kindergarten a total of 66 kids not even counting the teachers. Now if I do something for Nicholas, I also have to do something for Bryan. Thank God it wasn't the entire 4th grade, lol.

So I decide I am going to use Duncan Hines box cake mix since I have so much success from them and that is what Wilton recommends also. Figuring, without reading the box of course, that I will need 8 boxes of cake mix to be on the safe side since 1 box must equal 1 dozen cupcakes.

Sparking up the 2 mixers I have in my kitchen, I embark on a mixing mission pouring each batch of vanilla cupcake batter into a giant red bowl I have. 7 cake mixes later the giant red bowl is filled to the top and I mix the chocolate cupcake mix while I begin filling cupcake liners. Well, let's just say my calculations were off by ALOT!

Including the chocolate cupcakes minus the 4 that JT and I ate some where in the middle, the count is at 140. For Nicholas' cupcakes they are going to have graduation caps on them made out of mini reese's cups, chocolate squares, blue mimi m&m's and icing (I'll post pics and instructions when i am done). For Bryan's we are going to ice them and put a sugar cookie on the top that has a bulldog footprint (again will post pics).

Thank God I have no homework tonight so I can come home, make dinner for the hubbs and start on the completion of my little master pieces. I guess I should be getting off here for awhile and getting ready to go to that nasty place known as my job. ttyl.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Giveaway is now closed!

Our first ever giveaway is officially closed! We will be announcing the winner this week! Good luck to you all!

Friday, May 14, 2010

First Ever Giveaway! 500 Business Cards!!

Some of you may or may not know this but I have been having the time of my life with blog giveaways! I have won many things and my friends at www.uprinting.com have given my the opportunity to host my own giveaway!

500 Business Cards

2 x 3.5”, 2 x 2” (square card) or 1.75 x 3.5” (slim card)

14 pt gloss cardstock, 14 pt matte cardstock or 13 pt recycled uncoated cardstock

Full Color Both Sides; Offset Press; 3 Business Day Printing

Shipping: FREE UPS Ground Shipping

Color Business Cards - http://www.uprinting.com/Business-Cards.html

printing services - http://www.uprinting.com/

Eligibility: Limited to US Residents only. Must be 18 years old and up.

How to Enter:

Be sure to include your email address in each comment so I know how to contact you.

1. You must be a follower (1 entry)
2. Tell me what you will be using the cards for (1 entry)
3. Follow me on Twitter (1 entry-see sidebar)
4.Follow me on Facebook (1 entry-see sidebar)

Contest end May 21, 2010! Winners will be announced on May 22, 2010.
You will have 48 hours to confirm you won or the next person will we awarded the prize.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Crawfish Cake

I have been taking Wilton Cake Decorating Classes. I am in course 2 currently which, due to a recent change at Wilton is no longer like the older course 2 so my amazing Wilton instructor at JoAnn's fabrics, Lisa, is somehow combining the old course 2 with the new course 2. Let me say that I love my class almost as much as I love Wilton.

This weekend my cousins are hosting a crawfish boil. They do this a couple of times a year and since I need practice working with fondant and my husband is tired of eating cake, I decided to make a cake to take to the gathering.

I used Wilton's pre-colored fondant for the corn and the crawfish. I love the pre-colored fondant because making it the exact color you are trying to get is not always easy. The only draw back is that fondant is not cheap and this was a 4 pack of primary colors so the individual packages weren't very big but the colors turned out great.

I started with the corn first. I was 3/4 of the way through the 1st ear of corn when the hubby said "Wow, that looks like real corn"! I am not good at making things look realistic so the crawfish are both cartoonish in nature but I like them. The potatoes are just rolled fondant with Wilton's brown food coloring gel brushed on to them.

I am looking forward to putting the cake together tonight and diving in on Saturday. Having something sweet to cut through the spice of the crawfish boil mix will be nice.

Have a sweet day.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

check out this giveaway! I did

This is an amazing giveaway! Check it out!

Monday, May 3, 2010

The 1st time with the whole 6 pack


Since we got married on March 7th, we had our first outting with the 6 pack. That's what we call our 6 children. We went to eat in downtown Midlothian, Texas since my oldest 3 children had to also attend their grandfather's 79th birthday party that afternoon. It was interesting to get our whole family together. We looked more like a school field trip and we got lots of stares. It was amazing how well everyone got along, like they had known each other the entire time.

My husband was a little quiet but this is my favorite outting with my family since it is the first one. Can't wait for summer so we can spend more family time together.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Snap, Crackle, Pop

So my shoulder has been bothering me for a week and I decided, on the advise on a few friends to see a chiropractor. Now I have NEVER gone to a chiropractor before so I was slightly scared, yes me, scared. So I get to the chiropractor's office and I'm waiting for my husband to get there, told you I was scared. JT finally gets there and Dr. Taylor (no relation) comes in and starts this battery of tests.

So once we get past all the tests we begin all these procedures. I got electroshock therapy on my shoulder and neck, I got laser light on my neck and shoulder, I got some kind of joint movement thing done but the two things I am still laughing about.

The first thing is the pink tape. They clean my shoulder with alcohol and put this tape, pink of course. This is suppose to pull everything up so that the range of motion can improve and also so the C5 and C6 nerve endings can heal. Kind of weird but ok.

Then I got adjusted. Lord I did not know it was possible for a person to snap crackle and pop that much! LOL! I'm sore today but I felt like jello after I left. My husband is being patient although he would like his wife back to normal as soon as possible.

Monday, April 5, 2010


Ok so I am a dork! I am prone to accidents and I catch every illness my children and husband bring home from the public school districts that they go to school and work but this one is funny.

Last week I was blow drying my hair with hair dryer in one hand and hair brush in the other in the hand above your head position. Well the urge to sneeze hit. I don't just sneeze one time, it's more like a million times, so I kept one hand up and covered my mouth with the other. So the arm that was up, I hear my shoulder pop and it begins to hurt.

So 2 days of resting and not using it and then Easter weekend hit and of course I probably over did it. Now it hurts up my neck and down part of my arms just typing and hitting the buttons on my telephone at work.

My friend suggested I go see a chiropractor, my husband says let's doctor me at home, no insurance says and MRI is out of the question but it's not getting better and it is hurting worse!


Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Life In The Country


These are our little duckies. The little black one is named Shadow and the stripped one is of course named stripes. They are funny little guys. If you pick up one the other one goes to chirping, since they don't quack yet, until you put them back together. They peck on each other, splash each other with water and soak the paper in the bottom of their cage on a minute by minute basis. Both of them get on one end of the cage and sprint (or should I say quickly duck waddle)to the other side.


These are the baby chicks. They are not really my thing but they will be going to my mom's soon. We started out with 18 baby chicks. Within the first hour home, one died. Then the first night, one drowned in the water thing that the feed store recommended and one other died but I don't know why. Then over the weekend we ended up with 6 more that died for God only knows why reasons. So we are down to 9 baby chicks and they are the loudest, rowdiest chicks I can remember. I was disappointed and slightly grossed out with their passing (thank God JT is a fireman and can handle things like that because for me, I was not going to bury them) but this is our first go round with baby anything so I think we are doing alright.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Super Mom or Some Version of It


I'll admit it, I want to be Super Mom. I want to be the kind of mom that can manage a full-time job, be a full-time student, be a full-time mom and wife and still have time to be a master gardener, worlds greatest cook, a mini version of Martha Stewart all while dressed in heels and pearls like June Clever. However, this is an unrealistic expectation.

My life is a little different than that. Currently it consists of someone else doing my laundry and that of my husband and children. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it because it's one less thing I have to do but it makes me feel like I'm not taking care of my family. Right now I have someone else cook the meals I eat, again so grateful but I can cook sometimes. Right now I have someone else clean the house, do the dishes and pack my husband and sons lunches. Why? Because we are living with my inlaws while we save money for a house.

It makes me feel inadequate at times but I am grateful. With running an entire department at work, going to school full-time and adjusting to new situations, I am totally grateful but I want to be a good wife and mother in my own eyes and not just in the eyes of my husband or children.

I am envious of those women who can manage to do it all and make it look easy because I'm not one. Maybe one day I can be a Super Mom but it won't be today.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Social Worker

I go to school online at the University of Phoenix. "I am a Phoenix"! I love it 95% of the time. I am getting my degree in social work.

Social Work is not a very glamorous choice in careers but it is one of the most rewarding. The average salary of a social worker with a bachelor's degree is $40-49K, which is only about $10k more than what I make now without a degree. For me it's not about the money nor will it ever be.

I have not always had the life I have right now, part of the reason I embrace the life I have now so much. I made many bad decisions. They say everyone hits rock bottom and for me rock bottom was when I ended up with my 4 year old daughter living at the Salvation Army. Now my husband hates for me to talk about this, not because he is ashamed of me but because I was in that situation and honestly, I use to be ashamed of it too until I realized that the Salvation Army was where I hit rock bottom and God allowed me to come back up.

Why social work? I have been asked this question more than once. For me it's not about changing the world. For me it's about having God use me to impact the life of one person the way he used another person to impact my life.

I will never forget her as long as I live, nor will I ever be able to repay her. Her name is Venette Meacham. She is an average built woman with a heart as big as Texas but she is a no nonsense kind of woman.

When I first started seeing her, I would go in crying and having a pity party. Ms. Venette would fold her arms, lean back in her chair and when I was exhausted she would ask "Are you done now? Fix ya face. Now what are we going to do about it?"

She never gave me the answers or told me what to do but taught me how to think about goals and game plans and how to work my way through issues, how to see myself in a different light and then one day she said the thing that had the most impact on me ever "Joni, I believe in you." and she honestly did.

While I was there, my daughter went to live with her father, I had some legal things go on but I also had some amazing things happen too. I found God who had been calling me for years, I began approaching things in a new way, I began to think about my life further than just tomorrow. I would find information about health fairs,back to school fairs, etc and post it on the bulletin board for others to use and eventually I was able to move out on my own.

The road hasn't always been easy but it's taken me 3 years to correct 10 years worth of junk and I still have some things I'm working on. I still call Ms Venette from time to time and in January I will have my Associates in Social Work and not long after that my Bachelor's Degree.

A Social Worker is really about doing God's business here on Earth by helping his people who are in need.

I would have never chosen any other career field ever. My parents say it's because I'm a bleeding heart Liberal. I say it's because God touched my life and my heart in a way that only certain people could ever begin to understand.

Friday, March 12, 2010


I was never fond of homework even when I was a kid and had no choice but to go to school. Now I am going to college full-time, I work full-time, I am a full-time mom and a full-time wife. Ugh! Would it be possible for me to do anything part-time, lol?

This semester or block of classes I have Introduction to Psychology (which should help me be able to understand why the ex-wife is crazy) and also Ethics and Laws in Human Services in the Medical Industry. Ok, I understand the Ethics and Laws part but I am not going into the medical field, don't care about HIPPA, etc but to give you an idea. The picture is my reading assignment for my Ethics Class for one assignment. It's 4 different articles, 2 of which are 20 pages, 1 is 12 and the last one is 6. Lord help me because I didn't get to spend much time with my husband last weekend because we were busy entertaining, this is the first weekend we have been kid free for a month and I was looking forward to time with him but guess he's sharing with homework, lol.

We are also going to my mom's for the weekend. She lives on 22 acres and I am so taking advantage of the whole 22 when we are down there with the 4 wheeler. We are also celebrating my grandparent's 40th wedding anniversary. So between my obligations, I am going to enjoy every second with my hubbs.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Herps Device

Our son Bryan will be 10 in just a matter of a week and a few days. He was a brave solider Monday at the dentist. Bryan has a severe over bite, the kind that kids make fun of. He has almost always had it and it doesn't seem to bother him the way my crooked teeth bother me but rather than have him just deal with it forever, we decided to do something about it.

So he was fine at first until he got back to the house. Monday night was suppose to be our night with the boys but his mom wanted to get him. Yep, he didn't eat anything because the pain set in. He spent yesterday at his mamaw's (the ex-wife's mother) where again, he was given what he wanted to eat rather than what he needed. Don't get me wrong I know he is in a ton of pain but the dentist says he has to practice eating, swallowing and talking, which has become a task in itself.

So yesterday he ended up at our house because he wanted to be with us. Now this made me feel amazing that the little guy would rather be at our house. He had the hardest time talking, it's hard for him to close his little mouth, he is constantly sucking his saliva back because he's not use to the extra stuff in his mouth and then came dinner.

I cut him up some pork chops into tiny pieces like you would give a baby who had some teeth, we gave him some rice, jello and he finished off his dad's piece of our wedding cake. He did so well and I am so proud of him.

He has to keep the herps device in his mouth for quite some time so he is going to have to get use to it. It pushes the bottom jaw out while pushing the top jaw back. Trust me it looks painful. Thank God for a brave little boy, the makers of Tylenol and an amazing husband.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

So In Love

I am so in love. I know that I should be considering that I got married 2 days ago but I am totally head over heels in love. It's the kind of love where I want to do everything in my power to make sure I show him that I love him because words will never do it justice. I love him to the point it hurts and only if you have ever really been in love will you understand that.

It's amazing to have someone really understand who you are and at times a little irritating when you are use to hiding your true self. He is an amazing man who would do anything for me and I would do the same for him.

Every day when the alarm clock rings it makes me sad because I know for the next 13.5 hours we will be apart and then when we get home there are a million things that have to be done so I still miss him. I can't wait for the weekends but I am really missing my husband now because we spent no time together this weekend with the wedding.

He makes me feel special, beautiful, unique, feminine and fragile and he has always made me feel that way. I love him more than a fat kid loves cake. He says this line quite often so I felt it was appropriate for me to use it here.

I am so in love and I can't wait to get home today and kiss his lips and climb into bed next to him so he can wrap his strong arms around me and hold me until we drift off to sleep. I can't imagine my life without him, nor do I want to.

Monday, March 8, 2010


My weekend was wild to say the least. Friday we had to pick up last minute stuff for the little family reception we were going to have and we ended up going to bed after midnight. Saturday morning I attempted to sleep in, yeah, that was a no go because I had to make favor boxes and get myself and my 8 year old daughter out the door and to go buy dresses.

Lexi found a really cute dress at Ross, which was the 2nd store we went in and she was done shopping but I had to inform her that shopping was going to be an all day ordeal so she better get comfortable. After what felt like a bajillion stores, I had my dress, actually two, and we were headed home, of course this was after she got something new at almost every store we went to plus got lunch at Olive Garden.

Saturday when we got back, I helped JT as much as I could and then had our redneck bachelor/bachelorette party with some of JT's cousins and my brother-in-law Bobby and about 10 kids. This is how you party after you become a parent...lol.

Sunday morning was hectic and the church service seemed to take forever and then it was time. Twice I had to stop myself from crying and I knew if JT started, I was done for. No one ever prepares you for how many butterflies your tummy gets when you are getting married.

Back at the house we had about 40 people I think between family members, friends and kids. Almost all the food we got was gone, most of the drinks and since it was rainy and muddy it made for an interesting time.

My mother-in-law bought me a cake, which I wasn't thrilled about at first but man it was good and pretty in pink too, lol.

After taking Alexis to her dad's, we finally made it to our hotel room for the night about 1130pm and the only thing I wanted to do was shower and go to sleep. I never understood why people wanted to sleep on their wedding nights but now I know. Both of us are back at work this morning but I am officially Mrs. Jermey Taylor.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Flutterbies in my tummy...I mean butterflies

butterflies Pictures, Images and Photos

I can't believe this day is drawing close to an end. I am so excited about Sunday I don't know what to do but also wondering what the phone call from my Daddy will bring. I am so anxious, nervous and excited all at the same time I don't know what to do. I have butterflies in my stomach like when a girl goes on her first date because I know in my heart and in my soul that what God puts together, man can't tear it apart.

I can't wait to marry you Jermey Scott.

3 days until we get married

We decided against the big wedding ceremony and just use the money for a house and furniture. Good move I thought since we had both been married before, yeah ok.

So we go last night and talk to the pastor of the church we go to, the Cowboy Church in Ennis and he agrees to marry us on Sunday in his office after church. My future father-in-law went with and it was news to him. I honestly did not know he didn't know. By the time we went to bed last night, the family decides we are having wedding cake, a bbq and the invites started.

I just wanted to get married and be done but it will be ok. Right now I have a laundry list of things to get done before Sunday morning and did I mention I have finals this week?

My stomach is in knots, I have butterflies from the excitement and I can't wait for sunday to get here, not because our friends are coming, not because our families are going to be there but because on Sunday I become his wife.

I love him so very much and I just want to start forever with him.

Wish me luck as I have to manage to get so much done in the next 3 days and thank you JT for all of your help with the making things happen so quickly.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Finally Getting Married

So this morning we both woke up before the alarm clock! Blame it on excitement. So we both showered, got dressed and headed to downtown Dallas to the records building. We didn't have to wait in line but JT did have to wait for me to get out of the bathroom, lol. So you fill out this online application that asks "if you are related", Uh, no that is gross. You pay the $71 for the marriage license and you then have to swear you are not related. I'm finding that very humorous but hey, no, we are not related, although my brother said we use to look like twins when JT had longer hair, lol.

So the person I wanted to marry me is not going to be able to do it because his weekend is slammed. This is upsetting but not his fault because I'm the one who changed everything up. So now I have a matter of days to get with the pastor where we go to church, work out where and what time on Sunday we are doing it because 3+7=10 and then I get to marry the love of my life.

I love you JT and I can't wait. Think I will look up some back up plans to our back up plans, lol.


Joni Lively Taylor

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Quit Smoking

Everyone in my immediate family smokes: My mom, my stepdad, my brother and sister-in-law, even my baby sister, well she's about to be 21 so I guess she's not a baby anymore. The whole time I was growing up I swore I would never smoke. It was a nasty habit that smelled and killed you young. Hit the fast forward button, age 26, and I too picked up this nasty habit.

Normally I don't smoke a lot. It will take me 2.5 days to get through a pack of cigarettes unless we are having a Saturday night and then we go through them quickly. Recently I've been thinking a lot about health and the future and sticking around for as long as possible. Not that I want the kids to hurry and grow up but I do want to be around to see my grandchildren and great grandchildren would be nice too.

Since I started smoking I noticed a change in my energy levels, my eating habits, what I drink during the day and how much, that I can't smell as good as I once did, that I am sicker more often (not that my immune system is just awesome or anyting), and that my skin is nasty and my hair is different, so I decided last night to quit smoking.

We headed to Walmart to buy things we needed for lunches and for breakfast for the next 2 weeks and headed over to the section maked "Stop Smoking". There are about 8 different things to choose from so I decide I'll go with gum. It might help with the oral fixation, it might actually taste good and I can control how much of it I use.

There are 2 strengths of gum. One is 4MG for those who smoke more than 25 cigarettes a day-I almost died when I read this. Who smokes that many cigarettes in a day and how? or you have the 2MG for those of us who smoke less than 25 cigarettes a day. So I choose the one I think I want, get in the truck and light up. I mean I do have to finish the ones I already have.

So this morning I put the pack of gum in my purse after reading the instructions last night and head to work. It's all great until I reach the 2 o'clock hour. This is usually when I sneak outside to smoke when no one is looking, so I pop a piece of gum.

At first the gum is ok and I follow the instructions on how to chew the gum to a tee, mind you the instructions said 9 pieces a day for the first 6 weeks of the 12 week program.

Yeah, here I am 30 minutes before time to go home and I think I can just do this cold turkey. The gum leaves a strange taste in your mouth not to mention it's just weird and left my tummy feeling a little weird. This is from a single piece of gum.

So I will continue to carry the gum with me for the next 30 days, they say that's how long it takes to break a habit but honestly, I don't see me using it and if this nasty gum is the alternative to smoking, I think I can just quit that too.

My goal is to be smoke free in our household. I have fears about going to family functions with all the smokers because will it make me want one?

The good thing is I have a hubbs who supports me and loves me and even if I did slip up, he will forgive me.

Monday, March 1, 2010

My Husband


I don't think me get enough credit these days, at least the ones that are great husbands and great fathers, so I am going to give some props to my husband Jermey.

Jermey and I went to the same high school, go gophers, we were both in marching band, yeah band nerds, and we grew up in very similar households. At times I regret not meeting him my freshman year in high school, would have saved us all a WHOLE lot of headaches but God works in ways that we don't always understand. JT and I didn't start even being friends until my junior year, his senior year and we were serious very quickly. When we were together, it was the only time neither of us were getting in trouble.

As kids, things happen and well here we are 14 years later and we are just now back together and just now getting married, something that should have happened many years ago.

I said all that to give you background on why I think I have the most amazing hubby ever. My hubbs gets up every day and takes himself to the job he has had for 9 years. When he is at work, not only does he do his job, he supervises his employees and in addition, also does the jobs of other people, the bus drivers at the district and transports precious cargo from home to school and from school to home.

When he's not a work, he volunteers as a fireman for the small town that we live in. When there are no fires or car accidents or emergencies going on he is busy helping his friends and family do various things, like pulling engines (I'm telling ya ladies, it pays to be married to a mechanic).


As a father is the greatest. He isn't one of those dads who is too busy to do anything with his children or to sit back and watch them play. He gets out there with them, has fun and most importantly, makes memories with them. Now for me watching him be a good dad to his sons is one thing but I have 4 children of my own, so watching him treat my children just like they are his is amazing.


Now as a husband (I know we haven't gone to the JOP yet but he is my hubbs) he is just as amazing. I am spoiled, at least by most people's standards. Now I don't care about the things that he gets for me, it's how he treats me. Never once has he complained when I've vented about my day, which being the head of the Sales Department at my job, this can be a 2 hour venting session at times. He takes care of me when I'm sick, he brings me water or Dr Pepper when I am studying, he does little small things like take my glasses to get fixed when they broke without me asking him to or when I had an allergic reaction to the new laundry soap, he washed all my clothes.

He is good to my children, he is good to my friends, my family loves him and his love me.

I have the most amazing hubby ever and I am so glad I found him again and this time I'm never letting him go.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

It Starts With the Introductions

My cousin-in-law Brandie has a blog site and I thought it was a pretty cool idea. Not sure how many readers or followers I will end up with but our little life is so full of things that are worth sharing. So I decided to do the introductions so that you get to know our family.

There is Jeremy also known as Jerm and JT. Jermey and I dated in high school and were very serious until he made the decision to go to the Army and I made the decision that scared me and we broke up. Jermey was in band, played the tuba, went to the Army for 3 years, came home, married the ex-wife, started working for the school district,had two sons, got divorced, moved to the country, joined the volunteer fire department and well that brings us to current.

Next is me, Joni. I don't have any cool nicknames like everyone else in our entire family. I am just me. I was also in band and played flute and tenor sax (yes, band would be the way JT and I met to begin with), got married, had 3 kids, got divorced, had one more, had a few long term relationships that didn't go anywhere (thank God), started going to college full-time, met back up with JT after 14 years and well, yeah, here we are.

Joel is the oldest in our 6 man football team, lol. Joel is 13, plays football and runs track. He is very much a typical teenage boy with girls on the mind, dealing with raging hormones, acne and trying to find his place in the world. He is tall, taller than me and he is just 13. His feet have been bigger than mine for years. I still remember holding him when he was firs born, boy I miss those days. Joel is known as Lil Joe, Joe Joe and Joe Joe from Cocomo. He is funny and smart but also very sweet.

Next in the line up in Jonathan. Also known as Jon Boy, Jon Jon or Hoss to his older brother's Lil Joe, he is a very quiet, sensative, shy boy with a heart bigger than the size of Texas. Jonathan has dyslexia so reading is a challenge for him but he tackles it head on forcing himself to read chapter books to practice. He is a country boy and loves everything about the country: hunting, fishing, just being outside.

Next come the girlies, right in the middle of things of course. Jillian or Jill the Pill or Jilli comes first. Jill is also a quiet child, very loving and affectionate. It is easy to fall in love with Jilli. She has the dark eyes that will hook you before you see it coming and a beautiful smile to boot. She is very girly and loves anything pink and sparkely.

Mini Me, Alexis, also know as Lex, Lexi and Lexi Lou Lou, comes next in line. I swear I conceived this child by myself because she is my twin to a tee. There is not a feature I can find on her that isn't identical to me. She is like me in personality though a little more tom boyish than I will admit that I am. She tells it like it is, isn't afraid of much but she is a good girl.

Next is Bryan. JT calls him Monkey because he liked to climb when he was a baby but I call him Bry. He is into his video games and of course likes his 4 wheeler. He is very smart and at times too much for his own good. He hates his homework and doesn't try very hard to work on it, I think it's more because it bores him and doesn't challenge him.

Lastly there is Nicholas or Nick or Nickey. Though he looks nothing like JT, he is JT all day long. He is a sweet kid with this big smile that will make even the worst day seem instantly better. He will give you hugs just because and tells you he loves you all the time.

This is our little all American, blended family. I hope our adventures keep you entertained and also reminds you that we are not in control, God is.